Uncharted Waters

I wish I had been born in a future generation where there are no couples, or at least, it’s not the default, not the expected route – because there are lots of possible routes. There’s less competitiveness because women are equal, and we are all trying to emulate men and masculine qualities much less. Here the patriarchal, consumerist and religious drivers for marriage (and by … Continue reading Uncharted Waters

The Orgasm Gap. And some ideas about how to maybe close it…(Censored)

Leading on from the previous post; Female Pleasure – or not, this post explores the Orgasm Gap – as it’s something I wrote about having experienced, and then learned there was a name for it. In this article by Kate Hakala, is says that ‘on average, only 57% of women are having orgasms most or every time they have sex. The National Survey of Sexual Health and … Continue reading The Orgasm Gap. And some ideas about how to maybe close it…(Censored)

Female Pleasure… or not (Censored)

The blurb on my Tinder profile is pretty clear; ‘Straight up kinda gal, looking to meet nice guys for flings… (am I allowed to be that honest on here :)?!)’ I find it works pretty well, I get lots of matches and its genuinely what I’m looking for at the moment, so cuts out a lot of pointless chat and workings out with people who … Continue reading Female Pleasure… or not (Censored)

Women, be more like men; direct blame outwards

My previous partner blamed me for most things that went wrong. Him feeling stressed on the ‘holiday of a lifetime’ we took together to the far east to attend his brother’s wedding, his stress at me moving up to live with him (read; me leaving my job, my home, family and friends to leave everything that had been familiar to me my whole life to … Continue reading Women, be more like men; direct blame outwards

Dick Advisor (Censored)

I decided to invent a new tool (ahem) to go along with Tinder for use by hetero/bi women. Its true that, by and large, we are taught that the man ‘finishing’ is the ultimate goal of hetero sex and marks the ‘end’ of the sexual encounter. You’ll excuse the crass generalising (and thankfully I’m fully aware of how often this ISNT the case!) but Im … Continue reading Dick Advisor (Censored)

Weddings & Shame

Attending a wedding for the first time yesterday since my split from my boyfriend I was nervous of the inevitable pity and associated shaming that would accompany those words and looks from well-meaning family. I was pleasantly surprised on two accounts. Firstly, most of my extended family (who are very traditional in the marriage and kids sense) were amazingly un-pitying, unbothered of my single status … Continue reading Weddings & Shame

Do women have to emotionally ‘carry’ relationships for them to work?

I’m aware in my blog I sometimes refer to things being worse for women in relationships. This is from my own (hetero) experience and the experience of those women around me whom I feel put up with a whole load of bullshit in order to stay in their relationships, and often have to deny themselves, sacrifice their own needs to be so. The main thing … Continue reading Do women have to emotionally ‘carry’ relationships for them to work?

Rhetoric of Singledom

There’s something really important about the language & rhetoric used to talk about single people. So much of it is so horribly negative – in fact most of it. You might say this is the very reason I am writing this blog, to lend my voice to a different rhetoric around being single, discussing whats good, as well as hard about it – to normalise … Continue reading Rhetoric of Singledom