It’s not necessarily true that being in a couple is better, makes you happier than not. I was quite surprised to learn this (from my own experience) because I just always assumed it was true. And this comes from me – my friends would describe me as emotionally intelligent, attractive & fun – not a bitter person with unresolved issues about my past loves. Meaning its a voice that is at least as valid as all the bullshit that tells you your ultimate goal in life is to be coupled up/married and have babies – there’s other voices out there too that don’t demand this of you before you are a complete, legitimate human being, and you can choose to listen to them. Especially if you are a younger woman, compromising till the cows come home in order to stay in a relationship. There’s much more out there for you even though the vast majority of society and the messages it sends will have you believe otherwise.
I don’t know why they do this – where family is concerned I suppose it is tradition, pride also – the shame of ‘admitting’ your daughter isn’t married while the Jones’s is (god how awful this attitude is). There are the financial drivers, nothing new but don’t forget that our system means people can get away with doing almost anything to make money however morally reprehensible – including making people (particularly women) feel shit about themselves by showing them how their lives should look. I have friends who have sacrificed and compromise on so much in order to present this façade of looking like they are happy to the world – to attain the ideals society sets of being married etc. It is completely ridiculous and very very sad that they are in this situation. I don’t blame them completely, but I do believe you can step outside of the ideals society expects of you if you choose to.
To reiterate, I do believe, and know of people who have really lovely relationships. What I’m trying to argue here is that NOT having relationships is a completely valid life choice/ situation also.
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